The Boston Diaries

The ongoing saga of a programmer who doesn't live in Boston, nor does he even like Boston, but yet named his weblog/journal “The Boston Diaries.”

Go figure.

Wednesday, July 15, 2015

When you expire on your vacation

From
The Corporate Overload Corporation <XXXXXXXXXXXX>
To
Conner, Sean <XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX>
Subject
New SAS Work Order 4912, The account XXXXXXX for Conner, Sean has been disabled 07/15/2015 08:54:11
Date
Wed, 15 Jul 2015 11:57:13 -05:00

Dear Conner, Sean,

Thank you for emailing Systems Administration & Support. [When did I do this? Did I do this? Who did this? —Sean] Work order number 4912, has been created for The account SConner for Conner, Sean has been disabled 07/15/2015 08:54:11, on Wednesday, July 15, 2015 8:55:51 AM.

Please note that outside of core business hours for your region, workstation support is provided on an "Emergency On-Call" basis.

For on-call support issues pertaining to:

Please call the North America SAS support line : (XXX) XXX-XXXX or xXXXXX

State the nature of your call, contact details and any other pertinent information and your call will be turned into an incident ticket and the On-Call technician will be paged.

For production support requests, please contact the Network Operations Center for your region - for issues pertaining to:

North America INOC : XXX-XXX-XXXX or XXX-XXX-XXXX

Europe, Australia, other locations after hours:

European INOC: XX XX XXX XXXXXXX XXXXXX X

State the nature of your call, contact details and any other pertinent information and your call will be routed appropriately.

Kind Regards
Systems Administration & Support
XXXXXXXXXXXX
XXXXXX XXXXXXXX

You mean my long national nightmare of expiring accounts is not over yet?

Sigh.


Notes about an overhead voice mail message at The Ft. Lauderdale Office of the Corporation

From
Voicemail System <XXXXXXXXXXX>
To
Sean Conner <XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX>
Subject
New message 1 in mailbox XXXX
Date
Wed, 15 Jul 2015 11:57:43 -05:00

Sean Conner,

There is a new voicemail in mailbox XXXX:

From
"XXXXXXXXXXX XXX" <XXXXXXXXXX>
Length
0:35 seconds
Date
Wednesday, July 15, 2015 at 11:57:47 AM

Dial *98 to access your voicemail by phone.
Visit http://XXXXXXX­XXXXXXX­XXXXXXX­XXXXXXX­XXXXXXX to check your voicemail with a web browser.

There is?

Looks at phone.

Oh yes, there is. It probably has something to do with my expired account no doubt.

Picks up the phone, and dials *98.

“Ring.”

“Ring.”

“Ring.”

“Comedy Mail. Mailbox.”

“Comedy Mail. Mailbox.”

“Comedy Mail. Mailbox.”

What the— Okay, I think this is the password.

Dials a few numbers.

“Password.”

“Password incorrect.”

“Password.”

“Password incorrect.”

Oh! I guess it was this then …

Dials some different numbers.

“Password incorrect.”

“Password.”

“Password incorrect.”

<click>

Okay, let me try that again!

“Ring.”

“Ring.”

“Ring.”

“Comedy Mail”

Yeah, that's what I thought it said. Real funny.

“Mailbox.”

“Mailbox.”

Oh! It must be expecting my extension. Um … this is an “intelligent” desk phone talking to a custom business switch. Shouldn't it already know my extension? Bloody programmers!

Dials extension.

“Password.”

Dials some numbers.

“You have one new messages and no old messages. Please press …”

That's more like it.


Corporate password policies suck, but then again, you knew that already

Monday's expired account was The Corporation work email account. Today's expired account was The Corprate Overlord Corporation email account, which we only use to request vacation time.

The Corporation email account obstensibly expires after 90 days (but not really), while The Corporate Overload Corporation email account has a different expiration cycle of either 45 days or 50 days (but probably not really; Bob of Technical Support really didn't know). And it just so happened that both cycles converged on my vacation this year.

Sigh.

Also, while Bob of Technical Support could reset my password, I would be unable to change it for the next ten days!

Really?

I'm stuck with a temporary password for at least ten days?

Sigh.

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Obligatory Miscellaneous

You have my permission to link freely to any entry here. Go ahead, I won't bite. I promise.

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