The wind, I expected. Every weather forcast for South Florida reads the same:
Lows in the high 70s, highs in the high 80s. Partly cloudy with a 20% chance of scattered showers. Winds NE at 15 knots; seas 1-3 feet with a light to moderate chop.
But I didn't expect the hills.
Yes, there appear to be hills here in Lower Sheol. And for land that until a century ago was swamp, it sure is hilly around Chez Boca.
Michele Allen, 32, will spend the next month in jail after admitting to a wild drunken weekend dressed in this silly cow outfit, said Middletown, Ohio, authorities.
While at work Saturday evening, Allen hit the sauce hard and then stumbled into the streets—blocking traffic and chasing kids, said Police Major Mark Hoffman.
Allen also urinated in a nearby yard during the drunken grazing, cops said.
Despite having two nights to sober up, Allen was in a foul mood Monday, yelling at jailers.
“She was challenging people to 'suck her udders,' ” Hoffman said. “I'm not joking.”
I think, given the facts, that the jokes just write themselves in this case.
As I was writing about the two kids problem, I realized I could have used Smirk as an example, seeing how he has a new kid and all, but unfortunately, I mentioned that his new kid was a boy, thus making the chances of his other kid being a girl 50% (the reason: because you know yet more information in this case than just one of his kids is a boy—you know that his youngest is a boy, which removes both the girl/girl combination and boy/girl combination, leaving just the girl/boy and boy/boy, for a 50% chance of guessing correctly).
And even so, I doubt it would have been a good example anyway, as he now has two boys.
And now that I think about it, my friend Lorie has two daughters (a 50/50 chance [inside joke between the two of us –Sean]; Spring has two boys, my friend Ken has two daughters, and my friend Hoade has two daughters as well.
The only friend I can think of right now that has mixed kids is Bill, and he had, in order, four boys and two girls.
Heck, I can't think of anyone I know that has one boy and one girl.
I wonder what the odds of that are …