The Boston Diaries

The ongoing saga of a programmer who doesn't live in Boston, nor does he even like Boston, but yet named his weblog/journal “The Boston Diaries.”

Go figure.

Friday, November 17, 2017

I'm no expert in search engine optimizations, but I think I know more about the subject than this guy

From
David Parker <davidparker@weboptimizes.com>
To
sean@conman.org
Subject
Serious issue found while visiting your website
Date
Fri, 17 Nov 2017 06:17:14 -0500

Dear owner of conman.org <http://conman.org>,

Hope everything is fine at your end.

Would you like to know some of the reasons why your website is not getting enough visitors who might turn to be your potential customers/clients?

I am SEO expert of a leading SEO service provider company. As per my analysis , your website is not performing well in the Google organic search. Also your traffic is poor form last couple of months due to some of the reasons. Some of the aspects given bellow.

          Due to poor back links
          Irrelevant content used in website
          Keywords not in good position
          Due to errors and issues present in the website
          Unorganized social media accounts

If my proposal sound's interesting for your business goals, feel free to email me, or can provide me with your phone number and the best time to call you. I am also available for an online meeting to present you this website audit report.

I look forward to hearing from you - thanks!

We also provide Web-designing and development service.

Best Regards,

David Parker

SEO Expert

PS: I am not spamming. I have studied your website, prepared an FREE audit report and believe I can help with your business promotion.
[image: beacon]

Sometimes, a piece of spam will catch my eye, and this otherwise unexceptional piece of spam did. Aside from a few grammar mistakes (“sound's” and “an Free”) and the horrible HTML (although it did include a plain text version, so there's that) used in the email (probably vomited up by Microsoft Word from the looks of it) I'm not sure why this caught my eye.

To me, it's obvious that he never even looked at my site as I don't sell anything. I also have to wonder what “errors and issues present in the website” David is referring to, as I can't find any errors. Broken links, check. Keywords not in a good position, um … I guess? Errors and issues? I'm not seeing any.

But I was curious, and I decided to check out the domain he sent the email from, weboptimizes.com. And wow, what a wonderful site:

Index of /

Apache Server at weboptimizes.com Port 80

Index of /

Half the links there are forbidden, and the other half return no information.

I really have to wonder how much of an “expert” David is, and what “leading SEO service provider company” he works for. Because so far, I'm not seeing “expert” or “leading company” in this email.

So of course I replied.

From
Sean Conner <sean@conman.org>
To
David Parker <davidparker@weboptimizes.com>
Subject
Re: Serious issue found while visiting your website
Date
Fri, 17 Nov 2017 18:31:56 -0500

It was thus said that the Great David Parker once stated:

Hope everything is fine at your end.

It is, thanks. How are things with you?

PS: I am not spamming. I have studied your website, prepared an FREE audit report and believe I can help with your business promotion.

A free report? Sure, please send it to me.

I can't wait for my Free report!

Update on Monday, November 20th, 2017

I got my FREE report!

Obligatory Picture

[Here I am, enjoying my vacaton in a rain forest.]

Obligatory Links

Obligatory Miscellaneous

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